Update and Satire (Only mildly exaggerated)

Hey friends! So sorry I haven't been posting. I have a million excuses and no real reasons but I will try to catch you up without boring you to tears!

On the music front, I have been sick and have only within the past few days been feeling better. Apparently it happens to a lot of non-newyorkers who haven't been exposed to subway travel or come into contact with quite so many people before. That being said, my vocal cords are fine. I have a bit of lingering chest congestion, and coughing makes trying to sing an excruciating process. I want to sing and vocally I feel fine; but if I take too deep a breath I start coughing or simply can't get enough breath to move the air. I have my lesson with Mignon on Saturday after two weeks of not seeing her. I will ask her then what she recommends and hopefully I will not be prevented from using my lesson time well!

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On the job front, I simply have no news. It is beyond me why in a city full of people concerned about their time, so much of mine has been wasted. I have gone on interviews and slogged through the ad sites trying to find a decent person who will give me work to no avail. My work at the computer maintenance company is great. I love the office and my boss, the girls I work with are smart and nice people. But they can only afford to give me so many hours. Lucky for me (though not for them), half the office has been dealing with a cold, the flu, and pinkeye so I have been able to jump in and help where I can. I am learning quickly but there is just no substitute for experience. Story of my life, right? But my boss is proud of me and the work I do. My computer skills are apparently greater than your average worker's so I do bring some knowledge to my position. But I still need another source of income. Several less than appealing opportunities have presented themselves lately, but there are some that I just can't bring myself to do. I guess I ended up with a moral compass after all.

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On a somewhat related note, living within a certain budget has not always been easy for me. I have always managed to find a way to make ends meet, and still have Starbucks money to spare. This time, however, I am not so lucky. The real world is cold and unforgiving. Rent is an ever-looming obligation and I have never thought about the cost of food more in my life. Since rent itself is double my current income, I live on peanut butter and juice. I splurge on the occasional craving (and by splurge I mean spend more than five dollars on one sweet dessert or strawberries-- my personal weakness) but for the most part I have been good. But I am definitely learning how to be a starving artist.

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Now about the subways. It is extraordinary how much fun I have watching people on the subways. I am a total snoop! I just love to peep at people's iphones and blackberries, reading their facebook feeds, seeing what music they listen to, trying to write a mental dossier on their lives just by observing their manner and phone content. It is so much fun! Today, in fact, I caught a super macho man in his workout gear with a basketball in his sloppy, unzipped gym bag listening to Beyonce. Priceless. So, here are a few things I have observed and kept a list of in now particular order:

--There was a man who appeared to have a home, though I assumed not much of one. His clothes were mostly clean at least but out of fashion, unmatched, and extremely well-worn (strange for NYC). That being said, this man was wearing tennis shoes-- without socks. How do I know this? Because he took them off. His legs were ashier than Pompeii and his feet looked like they were home to more fungi than a mushroom farm. And then he scratched them. Not just once, maybe twice and put the shoe back on. No... I wish. He scratched and rubbed his bare feet for the better part of three stops on the express train, leaving a dirty pile of skin flakes on the floor and the most abominable odor to waft across the measly five feet of subway air, already atrocious in quality on its own, to where I was trapped. I had to change cars. Apparently, I wasn't the only one. We had a good awkward laugh.

--You will never experience wrath like that of New Yorkers waiting for a train that finally comes and blows right through the station without so much as a warning of arrival, followed by ten minutes of outrage while we waited for the next train.

--There is a guy who rides the 4 express in Manhattan, who in his phone, has someone saved as "Babymama." No lie. She had recently sent him a three paragraph long text and he replied with one word. Wonder what happened there....

--The subway at rush hour is ruthless. Especially in the evening because everyone is tired and mad at their boss (or so I assume). One lady, in a crowded subway car no less, was perturbed that my bag was touching her. So she turns around with all the New York attitude she could muster and says, "Miss, do you MIND?" Of course I mind. You're on a crowded subway. If you don't want to be touched or squashed by people you don't know, take a cab.

--If you don't speak English properly and that's why you don't understand the rules, you have no right to have attitude and throw a princess fit. Ferry or not.

--New Yorkers are bold. I'm not talking liquid courage bold, I'm talking people (men in particular) frequently stop to say, "Miss, you are so beautiful." "Ma'am, you're hot." "Damn, you lookin' fine witchyo big brown eyes." In the morning on my way to work. On my lunch break. On my way home from work. On my way to dinner. Walking my dog. Waiting for the ferry. On the ferry. And in many of these places, I'm stuck. I can't very well jump off the ferry or out of a train in motion. So I play nice and put on my best southern accent and tell them how much I 'ppreciate the compliment. And then I act like I'm deaf. I act like I'm deaf until I'm blue in the face.... Or something like that.

--Actresses look hungry. And I don't mean starving, although half of them look that way too. Actresses want to act so desperately. You can pick them out of a crowd. No offense to my actress friends, I love you all dearly. But there is something about actresses in New York that have this crazy hungry look in their eye like they will do anything to make a name for themselves. Just like DJs will hand anyone a card who will listen to them introduce themselves. And certain public transportation users will risk their own hearing for the sake of looking cool or pretending they're not on public transportation. Moms look tired. Businessmen look empty. Musicians look like they are torn between doubt and hope.

And new yorkers as a whole, are lethal with umbrellas.

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That's all I've got for now. I hope you are smiling and telling the ones you love you love them. At the end of the day, sometimes a brat just needs a hug or a distant friend a phone call.